....Valentine's Day

I woke up to a Happy Valentine's Day text from A. He works weekends so that's all I could hope for. We had lunch a few days ago and called it Valentines. 

Interestingly enough the beauty I have had a crush upon for months and I were interested in a lecture at the Pan African Film Festival. A friend had mentioned it on facebook, and I thought one would have to have tickets to get into the lecture. I was assured that was not the case and the lecture would be free to attend. I attempted to confirm through the festival with no luck. Nothing was posted anywhere and no phone numbers. What the heck wing it. 

I told my crush and he was on board. We met up to take the long bus ride to the festival. I was sort of cute in an outfit I made myself. A pink brocade pencil skirt, a frankenstien t shirt with one half grey Air Force the other half cherry blossoms, and a white and black Japanese Anime patterned bolero, white sandals. He wore a lavender polo button up, army green pants and red sneakers. 

When we got there a friend was spinning records in the courtyard. When we began to walk through, Bilial's 'Soul Sista' began to play. We both responded with the first few notes. He started singing it in perfect Bilial falsetto along with the record. I swooned a little. He's gorgeous and can sing too? 

We went inside and the theater was crazy crowded. I saw the festival info booth and went to ask. Turns out we did need tickets and it was sold out, and the tickets had been $35. UGH~! Embarrassing! We went through the brochure to see what else was happening. But it didn't really matter. Neither of us was equipped to pay $20 to get in anywhere. 

We went into the mall and I was hungry so I got a meal at the food court. He composed a cover letter on his phone. He kept asking my opinion.  I asked him questions about himself. He never asked me anything back tho. To me that says 'uninterested'. We did have fun talking and he is naturally funny. He's really into movies like I am, and we have many similar favorites. I know I could trust him on movie night to pick something good.  I did find out he is in his early 40's which is great for me kind of. But unless I drop like 50 lbs, and move away, I don't see him being motivated in any way to court me. He is extremely fit. He runs regularly and eats pretty healthy overall. 

I planned some drastic changes for myself anyway. Once my finances pick up change will be easier to stay focused on. Even though the day didn't go as planned, it was a great day. I was with a man I liked on Valentine's day. That was a good way to spend the day.

my heartbeat....

He is unbelievably gorgeous but in an earthy accessible way.

He takes care of his body, and he can dress himself. He also has a spiritual life. Alas he is forbidden fruit. Which should make him even more desirable. I guess on some level it does, but the risk is greater than the reward. When I move out I can say and do whatever I want. He always pays attention to me. Strikes up conversations, and engages me in some way. I would date him in a heartbeat if the choice were there. He's just what a woman like me wants. 

Denzel Washington is giving a lecture on Valentine's Day, and I want to go. But I have to find the money to travel. He wants to go too. Maybe we can have a day out. No one can know. There is pressure not to be seen flirting or interacting alone. It could threaten our housing. But it's nice to have a crush on someone.

I saw A after three months. He' s been in the hospital and had surgery. He had lost a bunch of weight. I felt like a giant next to him. We went out for lunch at denny's and visited. He finally bought a new car too. I love new car smell. I can't wait to have my own new car smell. We didn't get around to talking about sex tho.  Eventually we have to.